5 Things to Know About Dating a Climber

Maybe you’ve recently found a special someone. They’re amazing, you have a great time with them, and they rock climb. Perhaps you rock climb too but have never shared the rest of your life with another climber. While climbers are known for their welcoming, encouraging, and uplifting auras, climbers are also arguably quirky. What other sport leads to a bag full of stinking shoes, bags full of magnesium carbonate, sandpaper for skin maintenance, and demands some degree of a masochistic streak? Okay, maybe some other sports require a masochistic streak, but the point is that dating a climber takes things up a level. So, to ensure you and your partner have as much fun outside of the climbing gym as you do in it.

Here are five things to know about dating a climber.

1. Calloused Hands

Look elsewhere if you’re looking for a silky, smooth, dainty hand to hold. Callouses will cover their fingers and palms, nails will be scratched or clipped short (sorry to you back-scratch lovers out there), and sometimes chunks of skin disappear from the pads of their fingers. If you don’t mind the rough skin, you’ll soon find your fingers tracing the same callouses repeatedly while holding hands. And, if you climb too, they’ll play with your hands and trace your callouses, too. After all, to a climber, callouses are signs of progress and are worn with pride.

2. ‘Vacation’ is synonymous with ‘climbing trip’

There will no longer be vacations as you once may have enjoyed. Sitting by a beach, drinking mimosas, and lounging the days away are a thing of the past. When dating a climber, “vacation” means an outdoor climbing trip. That may also mean a camping trip if they fully embody the “granola” lifestyle. But don’t worry. If you prefer hotels or Airbnb, you can probably convince them to splurge under the framing that “it’ll improve their chances of sending their proj if they sleep in an actual bed.”

And, if it’s not a climbing-specific trip, you should be prepared to hunt down the nearest climbing gym to your hotel and have climbing shoes and chalk bag packed. Unless the vacation lasts under three days, your rock climbing partner will be antsy to find a nearby climbing gym.

3. Complaints about unheard-of muscles being sore.  

A rock climber must call on muscles typically unused in daily life. The more they climb, and the harder they climb, the increased likelihood that they lay in bed at night complaining of muscle soreness. No matter how long they complain about being sore, the best part is that they’ll still climb the next day - is the masochistic comment made earlier fitting now?

To prep you for the onslaught of “my body hurts” and “I’m sore” comments, here are a few of the muscles they’ll complain about the most.

●     Forearms

●     Fingers

●     Biceps

●     Lats

●     Abs

●     Triceps

●     Traps

4. The smell of feet is inescapable.

Climbers wear tight-fitting shoes, which are excellent at retaining sweat and stink. Leave their climbing bag in your car; it’ll smell like feet before the end of the day. Leave their climbing bag unzipped by the front door; the entryway will smell lovely when you leave in the morning. Accompany them to a rock gym, and it’s likely to faintly smell of sweat and stinky feet. But, to your climber, the smell is indistinguishable by their muted nose - likely filled with minuscule magnesium carbonate (chalk) particles.

If you aren’t a climber, here are some tips to minimize the stench. Communicate with your partner that you will not leave climbing bags overnight in the car. In the house, the climbing bag must stay zipped and in the designated area. Consider buying them show odor absorbers for their climbing shoes for the next holiday, birthday, or anniversary. Encourage them to clean out their climbing bag regularly (or if you’re feeling nice, you can do it as a surprise for them, but this is your warning for the impending smell).

5. Chalk on Everything

Unless your climber prefers liquid chalk or the climbing gym requires it, the powder chalk finds its way onto every piece of clothing and item. Most climbing gyms have a sink, but even if they wash their hands before leaving, residues of the chalk will remain on the clothes they’re wearing, the water bottle they drank from, and the outside of their climbing bag. The good news is the chalk washes off relatively quickly, but until you clean each item intentionally, the chalk dust lingers. Better yet, if they forget to wash their hands before leaving the gym, odds are the steering wheel will have some chalky handprints waiting for the next driver.

Your special someone is likely a wonderful person. These five things about dating a climber may or may not apply to the climber in your life, as they are broad generalizations. Luckily, none of them are severe enough to cause arguments and tension. Instead, they’re just the quirks that come with dating a climber, and together, you navigate (or mitigate) each now that you have this insider knowledge. Let us know if any of these resonated with you or if you have any other words of wisdom to share!